Thursday, April 27, 2023

Every day

I feel today that I would like to write a few words about my mom and the things I learned from her over a lifetime. 

This may not be the image that you remember when you think of my mom. I understand. It has been a lot of years since she looked like this. But this is the way I do and always have remembered her being. Her Stucki smile is legendary. I see it in my grand children today. She is the reason we smiled. She made sure of it in all our activities. And my dad was wise enough to know it was because of my mom.


Castle Valley is a term we use to describe the unlikely experience of achieving great things in the midst of very challenging circumstances.


You probably all tire of hearing that term repeated constantly, because on the forefront, Castle Valley is a life and a location for our farm in southern Utah. And today for many of us, it is simply a memory. But truth be told, it was a lot more than that.


This is important today because our experience in Castle Valley became a preparation for dealing with the hardships we encounter in life and overcoming them with faith and hard work. Our ancestors showed this kind of resilience in the face of their challenges. That simple truth helps us know that we are not alone in our trek today, and we can ride that wave victorious despite incredible odds.


Abraham Lincoln simply and briefly forever captured with few words in the Gettysburg Address the essence of the challenge facing this nation that once nearly tore it apart. He asked then whether a nation so conceived in liberty could long endure. The same question can be asked of the hearts of men amid the challenges facing folks today. 


My parents showed emotional resilience in the southern Utah community called Castle Valley. On that farm, they built a life and a legacy that has perpetuated time and the typical understanding of men. It eclipsed my comprehension when I was a young man as well, but I see what they did clearly now.




Emotional resilience is the ability to move forward despite setbacks. Overcoming obstacles placed in our way builds strength, character, and resilience.


Does a child show great emotional resilience because he doesn’t know any better? No. Children show great emotional resilience because they have hope. It is more than maturity or strength. It is integrity and faith .. two qualities we control. That’s how pioneers overcame their challenges. They believed in a dream and stuck it out until they and their posterity achieved it. That is how our ancestors made it through the challenges of their lives, and we achieve our goals the same way. Persistence and hard work cannot be overrated, but they too are not enough without faith. Integrity and faith are how we did Castle Valley. And those are the very same principles that get us through our lives of ease or hardship today.


What did I learn from my mom? She carved out a little piece of heaven despite facing overwhelming challenges. She stuck to it in the face of formidable obstacles. And she did it all with a smile on her face, and a dream in her heart, which gratefully spilled over onto us. We miss her terribly but enjoy her memory and anticipate every day our upcoming reunion soon.


Facing difficult challenges then has enabled me to confront similar obstacles without being overcome today. My point is not to belabor my challenges or claim my road has been harder than others, but the qualities I developed from performing these tasks like digging out the basement one bucket at a time have helped me endure the obstacles that confronted me and my family more recently.


When I am faced with raking the leaves that fall in our yard prior to each winter and feeling overwhelmed, I think of the 2-3 acre fields where we used to rake by hand the alfalfa for our animals. It was a humongous job looking back, but it was the only option at the time. And my parents insisted on it, probably because it taught us how to work and endure through challenges. It needed to be done, just like planting the 300 trees around the property. It was back-breaking work, but the benefits are still flowing.  Gregg and I dug dozens of fence post holes. It seemed like hundreds. Would I have done it differently then? Yes. Absolutely then, but looking back now, I wouldn't change a thing. It taught me lessons I needed to learn and built strength I needed to develop.


As I reminisce now, I wouldn’t do it any differently. Why? Because it was easy? No. It definitely wasn’t the easiest way. Because it was smart? No. Some thought at the time we had lost our minds. And on a few occasions when difficultly was staring us in the face, so did we. Because it was cool? No. There was nothing ‘cool’ about farm life at the time. 


I wouldn’t do it differently now because it was hard and taught me lessons I couldn’t learn any other way. Why would I ever consider losing the wisdom gained through the lessons of hard knocks?



Climbing Timp…it took me several attempts to summit the peak. For one reason or another, I tried to scale the mountain but was unable to complete the task. But I kept trying and eventually summited the 11,752-foot peak. Persistence paid off in the long run. It did then, and it will now.


And I know it from experience, and that is something I learned from Mom.