Mentors close to home

When I was a just little bitty boy, I saw my Grandfather as a busy man. He worked hard and had many responsibilities. But I never realized then how often he made time for me and his other numerous grandchildren. I could tell you about the fun we had playing miniature golf or shuffleboard with him at his home in Graystone. Perhaps I have told you about the time Grandpa took me out to dinner when I turned 12-years-old or the annual occurence of he and my grandma calling to sing me Happy Birthday over the phone to celebrate my birthday. 

Recently, I read an anecdote from my dad's journal that really impressed me and flooded my mind with memories. This helps me remember again how fortunate we are to have the great parents and ancestors that we do. My father writes the following:

Mother and Dad wanted me to learn things about electrical wiring so I could do things like change a light switch, and carpentry, so I could build things. When my father was a boy he only learned about farming. He never had a chance to learn any of these types of things. He didn’t know how to change the car oil, but he could get on a horse and ride it up in the hills and herd cattle. He could irrigate, pick fruit, and prune the trees. He knew all about that.

Dad often did special things, showing he cared about me. In my teens, when I was working summers, I used some of the money to start a rabbit business. I got booklets on rabbit raising. I built pens, bought does and bucks, and feed. I raised young rabbits just the right size for marketing, dressed them, and sold them to a Sugar House grocery store for their meat market. In time, I had expanded to twelve pens put together in duplex fashion, with free choice hay and grain feeders. They were located under Dad’s fruit trees behind the garage. I needed two more large pens to house the rabbits being grown for market. There wasn’t a place for any more pens unless I took out two of Dad’s cherished fruit trees. Dad graciously consented. I think I appreciated this much more as a man raising my own fruit trees.

Another time I came home from work, with too little time to wash Dad’s car which was very dirty, and get ready for an important date. When I was ready and went for the car, Dad had washed it for me.

As the children were getting older and to college and mission age, there was need for more money than we had in the family. Dad decided he was going to have to take a second job. He spent the whole day working for South East Furniture. At first it was six days a week. Then he finally got a day off and got some vacation time. He went to a bakery in Sugar House and got a job after hours. He worked late into the night cleaning baking pans and getting everything ready for the bakers when they arrived early the next morning. Well, his intention was good, but it was too much for him. He couldn’t handle that many long hours of hard work, and working that many days of the week. Mother realized that she needed to find a job too, and that’s when she started working.

I learned a lesson during that time. I had worked and I saved quite a bit of money that I used for my rabbits and pens. When I finally got into high school and started dating, I’d buy corsages and spend whatever I needed for dating. One day Dad talked to me about that. He was not a critical person and he was always gentle and considerate. He said, “It seems to be a mistake you’re making to spend so much on these girls when you should be saving more of your money for the girl that someday is going to really count. You’re going to have to go to college, and you’re going to have to buy her a ring. You’re going to have to be able to make a down payment someday on a house. You ought to think a little more carefully at how freely you spend your money.” Then he told me, “I won’t even buy myself a package of gum because it’s so hard to try and pay the bills.” I remember that, and it was during the time when he was working at two jobs. I began to think more about the consequences of some of the things I was doing. I learned to appreciate more what Dad was sacrificing to help the family.

When I was about to end my mission and return home, I got a letter from Dad. He wrote, “You’re coming home now. Your dear mother has worked her heart out” (at the time she was working) “to send you money for your mission. She loves you very much and I don’t want her to feel overlooked. So when you get off the train, I want you to run to her first, and give her a hug because she deserves it.” Dad was constantly thinking about the welfare of mother and he showed it.

Perhaps it wasn't obvious before, but we get many of our characteristics from ancestors. Now I know where my father got so many of the great qualities that I admire in him.

http://stuckifamily.net/