A pad of post-it notes costs somewhere around a buck, or perhaps the price of a single note is say a penny.
Roughly.
But consider the value sharing your sentiments can afford. Bear with me while I reminisce a bit with the following true story from a few years ago:
My fiftieth birthday started just like every day does. I turned off the alarm and followed my morning rituals. Once I made it to the bathroom, I drew the shower, shaved, and dressed. After brushing my teeth, I tried to smooth the cowlick standing up on the top of my head. “At least I have hair to smooth,” I thought smugly. Then I grabbed the handle to open the door to my bedroom, and everything changed.
Unbeknownst to me while I was showering, someone was preparing a scene to behold. I will never forget this.
Fifty balloons with tassels floated in my room; each one bearing a note of encouragement and love from a family member. I have all those sentiments tucked away safely and still re-read them on occasion today.
I am so thankful for my sweet family. I am really lucky to have them in my life. I urge you to share your love with your own families. It takes just a minute and costs practically nothing. But everyone wants to know his family is happy and secure. And sharing your love and support with them can make all the difference in your life and theirs.
When we acknowledge one another, we help ourselves. Honor your family and perpetuate respect for those who gave us life, for that is what eternity is all about.
We all care for our families and gratefully our good memories can last forever.
I love that I can reminisce and celebrate good family experiences. We have had some really great times. Thanks for all the kind notes, calls, cards, and thoughtful gifts expressing your sentiments.
So I ask you, can a simple note change one's life? I didn’t think so before, but I do now.
It is only in the celestial kingdom that we can live in families forever. There we can be united together and feel peace and joy in the presence of our Heavenly Father and the Savior, Jesus Christ. The prophet Joseph Smith described that wonderful experience this way:
“When the Savior shall appear we shall see him as he is. We shall see that he is a man like ourselves.
“And that same sociality which exists among us here will exist among us there, only it will be coupled with eternal glory.”
Because of all of you, for me it’s already started.
The love of my life was born in Washington DC, though she was reared in Ventura, California. Not raised as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, she and her family regularly attended another denomination. However as an adolescent, she came to know about the Church because she and her friends loved Donny Osmond—well, all the Osmonds really—and they attended concerts as often as she could convince her mother to take them to Las Vegas or down to LA to a Donny and Marie show. And it happened frequently.
Donny & Marie Osmond
When I was a little kid, Donny Osmond was popular. Looking back now, I didn’t really like him at the time—admittedly, it wasn’t really the cool thing for a youngster of my gender to do—but the girls went nuts over him. Though I will admit, I remember covertly watching the Donny and Marie Show on occasion, because I was kind of fascinated with his popularity, and he was a Mormon, so in that way we sort of had a connection.
I must have been 9-10 then. Little did I know at the time that my future wife was hanging on each word and every song of Donny’s. He was ultimately responsible, I imagine, for her willingness to let the missionaries into their home when the elders knocked on her family’s door while tracting in her neighborhood way back in 1976. For that reason, my attitude of Donny and Marie has changed considerably. I will always be in their debt.
My sweetheart is an only child. She and her father used to go together to the local high school football games, and they watched professional baseball together on TV. He took her and a friend to the county fair where he bought them long fringed leather purses that were right in fashion back in the 1970s. That was only days prior to his death.
Fast forward nearly ten years, and she pursued her aspiration of attending Brigham Young University. Ever since joining the Church, she dreamed of going to this university with other members and experiencing life in Happy Valley. She left California and the marvelous universities available there to come to Utah. There were those that couldn’t understand how she could do that. “You are rejecting some of the premier universities in the nation to travel halfway across the United States to attend BYU. How could you do that?” They couldn’t understand why she didn’t attend UCLA or Stanford or USC, but she had dreamed of going to school at BYU, and she loved every minute of it.
She tells about the dorm and her roommates. She reminisces about the friends she made, the major she pursued, and the trips home each summer to spend time with her mother. As my sweetheart relates these stories, it’s apparent this was a dream come true for her. Even now, she says life as a new student at BYU for her was like a fairy tale. These significant memories she will treasure forever.
We met at a dance. Since I was living off campus at the time with my sister’s family in southern Provo, my social life consisted of attending the weekly BYU dances. We used to assemble in the ELWC ballroom or similar facility and a live band would perform. Since I came to love dancing, and I had a few elective credits available in my schedule, I had taken a ballroom dance class, which came in handy at the weekend discos.
Frequently, these gigs were also held at the dorms, in off-campus student apartment buildings, or at the Star Palace (some of you old-timers remember that). Well, they were all fun and admittedly exciting. But the most memorable dance I ever attended was in the Garden Court at the Wilkinson Center. This was ages ago, and the band was setting up for the evening. I got there early as had a few others, and we awkwardly tried to play it cool in this uncomfortable situation. Before too long, more people arrived, the band started playing, and the dancing began.
I tried to demonstrate my chivalry when asking a young lady to dance. We would exchange names, and I would accompany her to the dance floor, where we began tearing up the floorboards figuratively speaking of course, or so we thought. Frequently, I tried to show the proper etiquette by escorting the young lady off the dance floor at the end of the set and thanking her by name. But in all the excitement, I would find that I didn’t pay attention very well or forgot her name in the heat of the moment by the end of the dance. That probably never happened to others, but it did on occasion to me. This was a long time ago but not so long that we were still using dance cards, which would have helped me use and remember my dance partners’ names maybe.
1885 Dance Card
For the younger generation let me explain. A dance card is a booklet, listing dance titles, composers, and the person with whom the woman intended to dance. Typically, it would have a fancy cover and a decorative cord by which it could be attached to a lady’s wrist or ball gown. From the 19th century until World War I, dance cards were often very elaborate, with some even incorporating precious metals and jewels.
In modern times the expression “dance card” is used metaphorically, as when someone says “pencil me into your dance card,” meaning “find some time to spend with me.”
This time, however, I didn’t need a dance card. I danced with a delightful young lady. She told me her name, and I remembered it. A few minutes later, she was available, so I called her by name and asked if she would like to dance again. She answered in the affirmative, and we boogied the rest of the evening. This was uncommon for me, but it felt right that evening. Following the dance, we walked to our cars and promised to see one another again. It has been more than 30 years since that night. She danced her way into my heart on that occasion and every day since. That’s how we met.
A few years ago, we arranged a little surprise getaway to a Donny & Marie Show in Las Vegas. My wife didn’t know about it, and when she found out we were going, she was very excited to say the least. But a memory I still treasure to this day is when the usher took us down to a front row table right at the edge of the stage. She had no idea and her elation was obvious and tumbled out in surprise and disbelief. That was the best part. We had a great time. I will always treasure that experience.
Many people have shared similar experiences and choice moments of many sorts when they look back over their lifetimes. I often wonder how I have come to be so lucky.The best decision I ever made was to marry my sweetheart and have children. The wonderful family she has given me and her constant love, support, and patience amid life’s challenges is my panacea. Life's elation for me is my sweetheart.
When
I was a young man in college, I had a friend at work who was a number of years
my senior, but we had fun visiting together and often worked side-by-side. One
day when I entered his office, he was rather melancholy and not the typical
animated companion I was used to. I asked him what was wrong. He said “Oh
nothing is wrong, but I had the most interesting experience this weekend.” So I
asked him to tell me more. He went on to explain that his children had come to
visit and spent the weekend at home with him and his wife. They were visiting
and having fun together when one of the boys, now a full-grown man, piped up
and said “Dad, remember when we used to go on those drives together when we
were kids? That is probably my all-time favorite memory of days gone by when I
was a child growing up.” Others chimed in and confirmed his sentiments. My
friend went on to explain “You know that was back in the old days when Relief
Society was held during the week. When my wife left to the her meeting, I
had the children at home all by myself. I really had no idea how to keep them
all happy, so out of desperation I would pile them in the car and go for a
drive. Now years later, my children tell me that was their favorite memory
while growing up.” He marveled how easy that treasure could have been missed.
We
remarked that frequently we don’t understand fully the implications of our
choices until well afterward. I have dozens of examples. One more that comes to
mind follows:
Though
I spent most of my childhood in Salt Lake City, we later moved to the country
in a small rural town called Castle Valley just outside Moab, Utah, where I had
the unique opportunity to grow up as a young man on the farm. At the time, I did not fully appreciate what a gift it was to have that opportunity. Now, I recognize
what a gift delight it was to experience country life and learn the value of hard work,
dependability, and thrift. It literally shaped my life.
Some
years ago, my wife and I purchased a video tape recorder. This was a brand new
technology at the time, and the particular camera we had chosen fit an entire
VHS cassette and looked something like a news camera. Though it was massive
when compared to the little, hand-held devices of today, at the time, it was
the peak of technology. We were delighted and brought the camera down to Castle
Valley with us—my oldest two were still small children—not knowing exactly what
we were going to capture. But we knew we should begin filming something for our
history. Well, it happened that I had the camera out just as Grandpa, as
referred to by my children, nephews, and nieces, was preparing to go milk the
jersey cow, Janey, so I started filming.
Grandpa
saw what I was doing and played along. Rather than just, completing the steps
as he prepared for milking, he began narrating the incident in behalf of those grandchildren
that would soon be watching the video. “So first, we get the milking pail and
put grain in this bucket for Janey to munch on–one, two, three cans, like
that.” He scooped the grain from a large metal garbage can, and in his
characteristic, animated way, he performed the task with a smile on his face
and warmth that radiated to his audience to be. “We keep the washing bucket and
rag here, so we will bring those along with us as well.” I loved being with my
dad and capturing this experience on video cassette was really great. He
continued with his daily routine, entering the milking shed, positioning Janey
and speaking softly and affectionately to her as he sat down on his
three-legged stool to wash her udder before milking. As the streams of milk
flowed into the pail, the steel of the bucket resounded with vibration until
the milk shortly began to fill the container. His hands were moving rapidly and
never slowed to rest his weary muscles. After years of milking, dad’s grip was
firm and the strength of his hands and forearms now lasted longer than the
milking. It wasn’t always that way, as I well knew. But over years of milking
twice a day, 7 days-a-week, 365 days-a-year for nearly thirty years, dad’s
endurance, consistency, and strength shown through.
Then
he began telling a story about his life. I continued recording as he recalled
an experience in Nova Scotia where he served as a young missionary without
purse or script. Dad said that back then, missions had the option of choosing
that method from among others, and that meant he depended on some kind soul to
give him and his companion a room and a meal in exchange for preaching the
gospel. Most days that worked fine, but on occasion he and his companion went
hungry and even spent some nights under the stars. He shared with us many other
experiences, as well. Grandpa had the uncanny ability to draw people in with
his stories, especially when they were about real-life events and included fun
and interesting observations about life’s lessons. This was no exception, and
not surprisingly, this tape became the favorite for our children. They watched
it constantly, literally every day. That way, they were able to enjoy the farm,
the animals, and Grandpa from long distance. Eventually the tape became so worn
and battered that it began showing signs of wear. Before long the sound on the
tape faded in-and-out until it altogether ceased. Later, the video was
misplaced before I had a chance to transfer it to a DVD. That was a tragedy of
sorts. After my father passed away, I thought many times I would like to sit
down and spend a few minutes with him milking Janey. Nevertheless, in our
memories, we are able to forever cherish the numerous moments like these.
Our
Castle Valley homestead was all about experiences, which if we were to attempt
to capture them all, I suppose they would fill volumes. We remember highlights
that warmed our hearts and provided satisfaction then and continue to buoy us
up now as we reflect on these choice experiences living off the land and
fulfilling a life-long dream for mother. Her dream became our dream, and the
life we lived there provided hope and joy then and solace now. We will
continue to treasure and share these memories for generations to come. Life was
hard and sometimes seemed unfair, but looking back with hindsight as they say
is 20-20. We can easily see the multitude of blessings that came from our
Castle Valley experience, and what’s more we are able to relive them through
our journals and our memories.
What
stories are you living now that your children will cling to the rest of their
lives? Make choices today that you can live with tomorrow.
Your posterity may just hold on to them
for the rest of their lives.
I go to work as a football player, but I
was put on earth to be a father.
We had an interesting Sunday School lesson recently. The
instructor asked us to read the hymn I Know That My Redeemer Lives p136
in the hymnal and share the lines that mean so much to us. Like you, I love
this song, which has a history of influence in all our lives.
The class members shared messages of hope, appreciation,
loyalty, and love. Gratitude for the Savior and his important mission was
apparent, and through tears many expressed their sentiments for a song and
lyrics which literally has changed lives.
This was just the beginning of a beautiful lesson filled
with the Spirit as the sister instructor and class members shared testimonies
of the influence of the Savior Jesus Christ in their lives. I thought of my own
feelings toward this song and its message. Each line describes personal and
evidentiary ways the Lord influences our lives every day.
My thoughts turned to my father’s final days on this earth
and his deep testimony of Jesus Christ, which still rings clear in my heart and
mind. I will always aspire to reach the same level of understanding,
appreciation, loyalty, and love he demonstrated so well. His words still inspire me today:
Our seminary teacher
and his wife spoke in the branch some time ago. Her talk was on a matter I have
long been concerned about. The problem comes into perspective at a sacrament
meeting: Adults as well as children give tender loving praise for bishops,
teachers, neighbors, and the prophet etc. But too few feel and express it for
the Savior. We are not achieving our most important goal until we have
established in the hearts of our children and the saints an even greater love
for Him. Friends may betray us, spouses may leave us, health may fail, and our
possessions burn up. But Christ, His promises, understanding, and love will
never fail us. With some trials and most tragedies, only this can get us
through. When we can take a thankless, demanding calling; give up something we
wanted greatly, so we can pay our tithing; or help out someone who has badly
hurt us ... and say "I wouldn't do that for anyone, except I'll do it for
Christ!" ... then the power for good he can have in our lives is becoming
a reality. He must be the foundation of our lives.
"I think about
the great sacrifices my parents and fore bearers made for me, and the great
example they set of complete faithfulness to the Savior and His teachings in
their lives. Now it's my turn. I would surely feel amiss to pass on to my
posterity something less.
"As sweet to me
and powerful in my life as the numerous blessings I have received, nothing
brought more peace, and hope, and joy than has come from discovering the
marvelous qualities of the Savior and all the gracious, loving and merciful things
He has done for me and my loved ones. I cannot in any way repay Him, or
properly thank Him. But this I can do, and seek with all my heart to do, and
that is stand as a witness of the goodness of the Father in giving us such a
leader and friend as the Savior.”
I will stand as a
witness that Christ is divine, has risen from the dead, and out of his love for
us has overcome every barrier to our return to Heavenly Father and enjoyment of
the unspeakable joys of eternal life.
I know that His
teachings are the only way to happiness and peace in this life, for individuals
and nations, and to joy in the life to come.
All I do and say is in
the hope that I might help His cause and help others come to Him for the right
guidance in life and the strength to do what's right.
I know that through
Christ, sins can be overcome and forgiven, and lives changed, and hope
restored."
Even today as I read those words, my heart swells with
appreciation and love for my father and the blessed opportunity I had to be
taught at his knee. He and my mother are one in their teachings, influence,
and desire to help, bless, and lift their children, grandchildren, and others.
Now that he is waiting for us on the other side of the veil,
I am encouraged to live my life every day so that I can take advantage of the
blessings he so beautifully articulates, which are all made possible by the
Savior Jesus Christ. He is the Son of God, the Prince of Peace, and our
Advocate with the Father.
Truly, though Jesus Christ all our fondest dreams will be
realized in his time. Because of the Atonement, hardships are temporary, happiness will endure, and life has
meaning today, tomorrow, and for eternity.
What joy this sentence gives: I know that my Redeemer lives.
When I was a young man, I had a teacher in high school that made all the difference for me. While I admittedly struggled with diagraming sentences, dangling participles, and other grammatical mysteries, his way of teaching connected with me and previously difficult concepts became evident and even fun. He taught us English concepts like metaphors and similes that have helped shape my time and eternity.
Similarly, we learn line-upon-line in life and continue to have moments of particular clarity. The old adage “a picture is worth a thousand words” refers to the notion that images—even those drawn in our minds—reveal insights and communicate information where otherwise lengthy prose would be required.
Even complex ideas are understood quickly and easily with pictures. And the Lord Jesus Christ himself used experiences that were pertinent and telling for the people at that time in order to drive home true principles and points of doctrine. The pictures and experiences he drew in people’s minds were memorable, engaging, and have lasted eons. He both clarified and veiled his teachings with parables. So simple a child can understand yet profound enough for the wise, the parables of Jesus are a priceless source of gospel truths. Teaching in parables allowed Jesus to reveal great truths to those who were spiritually in tune and, at the same time, conceal or hide those truths from those who were not ready for them. His life was spent ministering to the people of former times on numerous occasions by healing the sick, giving sight to the blind, unstopping the ears of the deaf, and even raising the dead. Those miracles were wonderful for the people of that time, but they have not ceased in our day.
Miracles continue to follow those that believe (Ether 12:12). God’s works are never frustrated. Some may say “I am not blind or lame or halt or maimed, and today we have fine doctors, immaculate hospitals, and superior medical knowledge. Do we really need his involvement in our lives?”
True. We have wonderful blessing abundant in our world today, but there is also tremendous hardship. At times of difficulty and loss, we have hope in Jesus Christ that our wounds will be healed and our hearts mended. The Lord is not offering to just get us by as important and helpful as that is. But he is offering to enable, empower, and heal us so that we can become more like him and enjoy the kind of life that he lives. And as we become witnesses of him, our lives improve and are refined.
The Savior taught frequently about choosing the better path. “A merchant man, seeking goodly pearls … when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had, and bought it” (Matthew 13:45–46).
Certainly you have asked the question why this merchant would give up all he had to purchase this one pearl of great price. Even a better question what are the pearls of great price in your life that for which you would be willing to give all? Family, the gospel, the Savior. Perhaps you have other pearls as well.
There is a series of short parables given by the Savior about the establishment of the kingdom of God in the latter days featuring a mustard seed, leaven, hidden treasure, a pearl of great price and fishing net.
“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like unto a merchant man, seeking goodly pearls:
“Who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had, and bought it” (Matt. 13:44–46).
Sometimes the obvious is staring you right in the face. We say “Why couldn’t I see that?” This happens all around us. Every day we hear of people clamoring to protect architecture / heal the animals / restore the environment / save the whales / keep the peace / preserve the land—yet we are willing to lose peoples' personal accounts every day. What were our pearls again?
Remember and savor what is most important. My belief is that some of our most important treasures are figuratively at our doorstep, in our field, and very much within our grasp today…personal histories.
Wouldn’t it be tragic to lose a most important possession that today lies right at our fingertips?
We certainly don’t want to throw the baby out with the bath water.
“I know my grandpa very well, because he wrote a journal that told much of his life’s experiences. I am so grateful for that. If I were to lose everything I had, and could only save a couple things, I’d grab my scriptures and John S. Stucki’s Journal. It means that much to me. “
–William Richard Stucki (grampa)
Grampa’s testimony was built with his predecessors and continues to bless posterity today:
When we feel and express adoration and praise for the Savior, we are achieving our most important goal of establishing in the hearts of our families even a greater love for Him. Friends may betray us, spouses may leave us, health may fail, and our possessions burn up. But Christ, His promises, understanding, and love will never fail us. With some trials and most tragedies, only this can get us through. When we can take a thankless, demanding calling; give up something we wanted greatly, so we can pay our tithing; or help out someone who has badly hurt us ... and say "I wouldn't do that for anyone, but I'll do it for Christ!" ... then the power for good he can have in our lives is becoming a reality. He must be the foundation of our lives. "I think about the great sacrifices my parents and fore bearers made for me, and the great example they set of complete faithfulness to the Savior and His teachings in their lives. Now it's my turn. I would surely feel amiss to pass on to my posterity something less. "As sweet to me and powerful in my life as the numerous blessings I have received, nothing brought more peace, and hope, and joy than has come from discovering the marvelous qualities of the Savior and all the gracious, loving and merciful things He has done for me and my loved ones. I cannot in any way repay Him, or properly thank Him. But this I can do, and seek with all my heart to do, and that is stand as a witness of the goodness of the Father in giving us such a leader and friend as the Savior.”
I will stand as a witness that Christ is divine, has risen from the dead, and out of his love for us has overcome every barrier to our return to Heavenly Father, and enjoyment of the unspeakable joys of eternal life.
I know that His teachings are the only way to happiness and peace in this life, for individuals and nations, and to joy in the life to come.
All I do and say is in the hope that I might further His cause and help others come to Him for the proper guidance in life and the strength to do what's right.
I know that through Christ, sins can be overcome and forgiven, and lives changed, and hope restored."
When the going gets rough, perhaps what we need most is not what we first expect. To assume immediate problem resolution is in our best interest may not actually be the case. When we stop and think about what really matters, perhaps the most beautiful and unexpected gift is peace.
Just prior to the Lord's ascension to heaven, he offered his grieving and fearful apostles assurance that he would not leave them without comfort. He gives us the very same promise.
I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you. John 14:18 We are never alone. He has organized his kingdom on earth to lift us when we crave his support and help most. We just need eyes to see what he already sees in us: children with a divine lineage.
Eighty percent of what happens to you is to provide opportunities for you to help and serve your fellowmen and in turn allow them to help you. The compassion you espouse and the empathy in your heart is given so you may aid those in your midst who stand in need of succor. That we all might see this vision and apply true principles to benefit our fellowmen in all generations is the great plan of happiness and the gospel of Jesus Christ in action.
Your mom loves chick flicks, and I watch and enjoy them with her frequently. Because they are important to her, they are important to me. We have assembled quite a collection of movies after all these years. But none of the DVDs are as romantic as the account in the Bible of how Jacob loved Rachel and served seven years for her hand in marriage. Genesis 29:18
These verses tell about the experience of a young man, Jacob, who was smitten with the beauty and well favored daughter of Laban. He agreed to serve Laban for seven years for her hand in marriage, but because of his love for Rachel, the time just flew by.
And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her.
Choice memories of my dad go back to my earliest recollections. He has always been my best friend and advocate. He is my hero.
A number of years ago, I went to a general priesthood meeting with Dad. We have been doing this together throughout my life when I have had the good fortune of living in the same general area as him. What was unique about this particular priesthood meeting didn't actually happen during the meeting however but occurred instead afterward as we walked from the chapel to our car. These are his words as I remember them:
"Mathew, I have always wanted to teach that it is our ancestors and loved ones on the other side of the veil who are our guardian angels, but I didn't openly promote it because I never heard the brethren comment on that as such—until tonight.
"Elder Bednar's talk this evening was beautiful. Now I feel that I have justification to teach that very principle."
Today is my dad's birthday. Of course, I miss him greatly, but he is not by any means out of my life. In fact, he is now a part of it perhaps more than he has ever before because his lack of proximity and ill health are no longer barriers to his involvement. For example:
He is part of my newly found job and guidance
He helps me endure to the end when the going gets rough
His stellar example taught me the importance of following Christ
He is in the successes of my children
He helps me make good choices and rear a strong family to choose the right
Dad always spent time listening to us when we were children and adults
I never saw him discouraged. My friends would ask "Does your dad always smile?" Yeah. Pretty much always. I asked him once why that was so. He said "When I think of all my blessings, I can't help but smile in appreciation."
My daughter just got back from a trip to Thailand. The whole experience was a joy, but I honestly couldn't wait to see her again. I anticipated her return and shed tears of joy as we embraced. I expect it's going to be a lot like that when we are reunited with Dad.
I have another Father in Heaven as well, and because of him, we are an eternal family.
She tells about the dorm and her roommates. She reminisces about the friends she made, the major she pursued, and the trips home each summer to spend time with her mother. As my sweetheart relates these stories, it’s apparent this was a dream come true for her. Even now, she says life as a new student at BYU for her was like a fairy tale. These significant memories she will treasure forever.
